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How To Ask A Girl To Be Friends With Benefits: 10 No Bullshit Tips

Even if casual relationships are the norm for many, it doesn’t mean that you can simply walk up to a girl and ask to be friends with benefits.

Like any type of relationship, you should have the appropriate approach to have a shot at your desired outcome.

If not, then you could piss off the girl and lose the chance of hooking up with her. And in case she is your friend, you might lose the friendship.

guy asking a girl to be friends with benefits

First, make sure to read properly the signs that she wants to be a friend with benefits. Then manage expectations properly.

If you’re looking for a regular hookup, act like a hookup every time you meet. And in case she isn’t available for sex as much as you would like, look for more girls instead of calling her up.

At the end of the day, when seeking a friend with benefits relationship actions and expectations is what matter. Below there are useful tips to make it happen.


10 Straightforward Tips To Keep In Mind When Setting Up A Girls To Be Friends With Benefits


1. Don’t Let Her Put You In The Friendzone

You can only go from being friends with a girl to having a friend with benefits relationship if she’s into you.

For this to happen, though, it’s crucial that you don’t let her put you in the friendzone. Or else, she won’t ever let you in her pants.

With this in mind, you need to amp up your sexual charm to appeal to her.

You can do this by emphasizing your manliness by being confident but at the same time gentle. Above all, you must flirt with her when you see an opening to make her aware of you.


2. Manage Expectations

A vital factor when you ask a girl to be friends with benefits is to manage expectations.

Because even if it may seem like a good idea to pretend to care on a deeper level, it’ll only make things much harder. As such, it’s essential to be frank about the relationship.

Set the expectation that after a hookup you are not available. Don’t meet, don’t call, don’t text – be out of her life.

If she tries to contact you too often, politely tell her that you’re busy. The trick is to have a lifestyle that doesn’t offer you too much time on hand.


3. Don’t Act Like A Boyfriend

One of the things that you must remember is to not act like a boyfriend.

Don’t take part in any of that lovey-dovey stuff that couples usually do to prevent her from hoping for something more with you.

Because if you behave romantically or sweetly, it can make her misunderstand your feelings. So avoid the relationship vibe and focus mainly on the sex.

Talking to her every day or have romantic moments is counterproductive. Instead when talking to her be straight to the point: let’s fuck later.


4. Have A Sexy Vibe

As explained earlier, friends with benefits relationships are all about sex.

So keep a sexy vibe on this type of casual relationship to remind her that it isn’t a serious relationship.

It’s important to manage expectations by reminding her of the reality. Girls tend to get sentimental over time, especially when having sex regularly with the same man.


5. Don’t Stick To A Pattern

When you’re in a friends with benefits relationship with a girl, your meetups should be casual and random.

This is to stop you from forming a routine with her since doing so has a high chance of making her attached to you.

As such, it would be ideal to see her a few times a month. Once a week or twice a month would be good, but don’t make it a regular habit.

If you make hookups truly causal and random, your friend with benefits will understand.


6. Don’t Sleep Over

While you don’t have to leave as soon as you finish having sex, you also shouldn’t stay longer than you need to.

What’s more, if you want to keep it firmly friends with benefits, then you should never sleepover at each other’s places.

It’s because when you share a bed with somebody, it’ll bring the two of you closer in some manner. This is proven by Alaska Sleep Clinic’s article, which says that sleeping together creates a stronger and greater bond between people.

Given these points, you should always go home after you bang her, no matter how comfy it gets.


7. Stick To Your Boundaries

You should lay down the ground rules for being friends with benefits from the start. And stick to your boundaries with no exceptions.

Doing this will ensure that you don’t cross the line and provide her with any false hope.

Moreover, you mustn’t open up more than you already have to her. Cause when you consistently maintain a certain distance between the two of you, it should send a clear message that you’re not interested in turning into her boyfriend.

In short, you just need to have the same attitude towards her all throughout the relationship.


8. Respect Her As A Person

One of the keys to making friends with benefits work is to respect her as a person. If you don’t, she won’t only reject your offer, but she’ll also stay away from you.

There’s no reason a girl would want to get involved with a guy who brings her down. And just because she’s sleeping with you doesn’t give you the right to treat her as a slut.

In a word, you have to value and treat her with dignity.

Recently we’ve written an article titled “How To Ask A Girl To Hook Up” which highlights the right behavior to have when hooking up with girls. The same applies to friends with benefits relationships.


9. Find Someone Who Can Handle The Relationship

A common mistake people make in this sort of relationship is having it with someone who’s not emotionally mature enough.

The thing is, anyone is free to have a casual relationship. Yet if a person isn’t fit for it, they won’t be good partners.

As a matter of fact, a lady who can’t have sex without catching feelings will no doubt be bad at it.

This is why you have to find a girl who can handle a no-strings-attached relationship with you. Someone who is open to a friend with benefits relationship.

This video offers some good signs to watch out for…


10. Don’t Prolong The Relationship If It’s Not Working

You may have started on the right foot and want to keep it going.

But if the girl you’re friends with benefits with is beginning to show signs of jealousy, it might be time to throw in the towel.

In this case, you don’t need to prolong the relationship if it’s not working anymore, as it will only get messier later on.

You wouldn’t want to deal with a desperate or angry woman, would you?

Besides, since you weren’t serious in the first place, it’s best to simply move on to a different lady that wants the stuff that you can give.

We’ve some useful tips on how to get over a casual relationship.




  • Louise And Dan

    We are born and bred Californians who love socializing, adventures, and sex. Being active in the ethical non-monogamy communities here locally and online, it's only natural for us to start this site to provide a 100% honest source of information about the sexual lifestyle in some of the world’s liberated adult destinations. We spend most of our free time traveling to hook up with singles, couples, and people of all genders around the world.