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San Francisco Hook Up Guide For Singles And Couples

If you’re after casual sex in San Francisco or looking for a friend with benefits, this guide will help you to get laid.

We explain how to hook up with couples and singles no matter your age, sexual interests and the relationship you’re seeking.

From one night stands to finding a regular fuck buddy, there are several opportunities for real hookups in San Francisco.


The San Francisco Guide was last updated on 21 August 2022

Guide San Francisco

San Francisco is well known to be the home of several tech companies and one of the best cities to hook up in the United States. Less is known that the city attracts many kinksters.

From BDSM to outdoor sex enthusiasts, there are all sorts of exciting people.

You will find several swinger clubs, striptease clubs, and hookups online to satisfy your sexual needs. But keep in mind that locals have a busy lifestyle so respect their time.

• Gender Ratio – There are 95 men to 100 women, lower than California’s average of 99 men to 100 women.

Etnichy – 45.4% White (40.0% Non-Hispanic White and 5.4% Hispanic White), 5.2% Black or African American, 34.3% Asian, 8.1% Some Other Race.

Number of Sex Clubs – 12 swinger clubs, 18 strip clubs and 2 BDSM clubs




Click a link to skip to that section. Don’t skip any sections!


Girls in San Francisco

San Francisco girls’ two biggest ethnicities are Caucasians and Asians, with multiracial Hispanics and Black Americans in the mix.

Local girls are techy, so you’ll find plenty of them on the top hookup apps and sites in San Francisco looking for casual sex.


Look And Physical Appearance

Commonly you’ll see White Non-Hispanic girls who are tall with thin frames and light eyes and hair… Or local American-Asian girls who are short and skinny with black hair and eyes.

No matter their ethnicity, most girls in San Francisco are beautiful and look after themself.

When it comes to the outfit, they have a relaxed and casual style.


Attitude And Values

Seeing that girls in San Francisco are smart and achievers, they’re successful in their careers. They typically work in corporate or IT fields.

Due to their jobs, they’re always on the move and pretty busy. You’ll find them to be well-traveled and tech-savvy.

Since work takes priority, they don’t have time to commit until their late 30s. So they prefer going for a casual or open relationship.



Many women in San Francisco have active sex lives even though they don’t have much time for relationships.

In fact, this survey by the Center for Disease Control Prevention says that 31.8% of high school students aged 13-19 ever had sexual intercourse.

However, the same report states that 91.5% did not use both a condom and birth control pills during the last sex. Meaning the majority of teen girls in San Francisco enjoy raw sex and risky behaviors.


Summary of San Francisco Girls

  • 3 traits: Girls in San Francisco are smart, well-traveled, and tech-savvy.
  • 2 tips: To appeal to the women in San Francisco, talk about being passionate about work cause they like guys who value their jobs. And learn how to ask a girl to hook up if you don’t want to waste opportunities.
  • 1 fact: San Francisco girls are confident.


Men in San Francisco

Men in San Francisco are tech-savvy and with logical thinking.


Look and Physical Appearance

Caucasian San Francisco men are thin with noticeably light hair and blue to light brown eyes. Asians, however, are lean with short height and black eyes and hair.

The average height for guys here is 5’10 with caucasian men taller than Asians.

All things considered, they tend to dress down and pair nice shirts with simple jeans even when going for job interviews.


Attitude and Values

San Francisco men are snobby and eccentric due to their profession in tech companies. They value work above all and don’t have much time to focus on anything else.

But when they do have free time, they are laidback and good fun to be around.

Given that their attention is mostly on their careers and move around often, they normally prefer casual relationships until their 30s. As such, hookups and flings are common for the young.



Guys in San Francisco love to have casual sex because they value their freedom.

This report on San Francisco high school students points out that 28.2% of those in 9th -12th grade ever had sex.

In addition, the report also notes that 20.3% were currently sexually active, and 97.3% did not use both a condom during the last sex and birth control pills.

It’s obvious that the young guys here have a carefree attitude about sex and enjoy doing it the natural way.


Summary of San Francisco Men

  • 3 traits: Men in San Francisco are snobby, face-paced, and value work.
  • 2 tips: To attract San Francisco guys, listen to their point of view and don’t disagree too often.
  • 1 fact: The majority of San Francisco guys don’t want to commit until they’re in their 30s.


Sex Life And Hookup Culture

pick up girls Helsinki couple intimate dating

In San Francisco people are busy with their careers or starts up. So they prefer to find a friend with benefits rather than get into a serious relationship.


Overall Mindset About Casual Sex

Basically, having casual sex is a right that anyone in San Francisco can enjoy without any negativity.

Not to mention the locals in their 20s–30s don’t want to date seriously. This is why having casual sex is especially popular.


Swinger Activities in San Francisco

San Francisco has around 12 swinger clubs that you can try. Some events to check out are Fantasy Party, Lingerie-only Nights, and Get Lucky Party.

Most sex clubs require a membership costing around $12 to $100 plus the entry fee. Some can serve alcohol while others have a BYOB policy.

Not all venues allow single men inside and some only on certain nights.

So make sure to find a sex partner on sites like Adult Friend Finder to accompany you to the swinger clubs for easy entry.

Yet, people on AFF organize private sex parties regularly so it’s only a matter to wait for an invitation.


Is It Easy To Hook Up in San Francisco?

The people in San Francisco are loose about casual sex and hookups. Especially online hookups.


Where to Meet People For Sex in San Francisco

There are many places you can go to for casual sex including nightclubs, bars and even swinger clubs. But online hookups are the number one option as the locals are tech-savvy.

So let’s dive in to see some of the best places and ways to get laid in San Francisco…


1. Sex Dating Online

The population of San Francisco is at the forefront of sex dating online in the USA. You can use Adult Friend Finder to find horny singles and couples down for a fuck.

It’s one of the best hookup sites in San Francisco thanks to the hundreds of members using it to find no-string-attached sex.


2. Night Hookups in Nightclubs and Bars

There are still several nightlife places to hang out if you prefer to meet strangers in the old fashion way, but nightstands aren’t the norm here.

Following are some of the best nightclubs and bars in San Francisco for singles:

• Cat Club – Located at Folsom St, Cat Club is a spacious nightclub that plays a mix of goth and punk music.

• Balboa Café – Located at Fillmore St, a hotspot for MILFs from Thursday to Sunday who are out trying to score younger men. Definitely the best cougar bars in San Francisco.

Learn how to hook up with cougars if you decide to visit this place.

• Butter Bar – Also located at 11 St, this is a popular bar among students that also offers cheap beers.

• Mauna Loa Club – Also located at Filmore St, a popular bar among singles that want to meet new people.

• Audio Nightclub – Located at 11th St, a funky 70s style nightclub with a sunken dancefloor, an energetic crowd and plenty of chances to find a hookup.

hookups San Francisco one night stand

Valencia Street at night

Looking to do bar hopping in San Francisco? Then Valencia Street on the Mission District is a hotspot for party lovers.

But that isn’t the only place to enjoy drinks because Fillmore Street is also famous for its amazing cocktails and singles nightlife.

Otherwise, if you want to dance the night away, then you can find the best nightclubs on Folsom Street.

And last but not the least, if you’d like to mingle with a younger crowd, then go to the Mission Bay neighborhood as that’s where the students spend the nights.


3. Sex Clubs: Swinging And Sex Parties in San Francisco

San Francisco is full of sexually liberal people. So naturally, the city offers plenty of opportunities to explore the swinger lifestyle.

The majority of singles and couples go to Bay Area as that’s where the most sex parties are held. But also use swinger sites to network with like-minded people.

singles couples swinger club San Francisco


The best swinger clubs in San Francisco are:

Twist – A popular group that holds lifestyle parties in the Bay Area of San Francisco. The venues offer an overall sensual and sexually positive atmosphere. Moreover, single men are also allowed on some occasions.

Kinky Salon – Located at Mission Street, Kinky Salon is a member’s only club that aims to provide a safe space for sexual exploration. It is a great place for swingers to connect with one another.

• Club Kiss – Located in the Bay Area, this is a more traditional member’s only swinger club that may be a bit difficult to join, but it’s more than worth it.

• Power Exchange – Located in Downtown, this is the only sex club in San Francisco open to all genders and orientations.


4. BDSM Venues

San Francisco is a city full of kinksters.

BDSM hookups in San Francisco

Folsom Street Fair

Not only do most swinger clubs like Kinky Salon and Club Kiss host fetish parties, but also, you can find dedicated venues to indulge in some bondage action.

If you’re looking for a pure BDSM club in San Francisco then SFCitadel has some of the best play gear you’ll find in town.

Aside from that, Bondage-a-Go-Go also hosts frequent fetish parties every Wednesday to connect with like-minded people.

All in all, San Francisco has many venues where you can explore your fetishes.

And in case that wasn’t enough, then is always helpful to connect with a large community of people who share your kinks.


5. Transsexual And Transgenders Places

San Francisco offers a vibrant nightlife for the LGBT community. Polk Street and Castro District are the most popular areas to hook up with trans.

Unarguably, Oasis is one of the best nightclubs to meet transsexuals. Frequent drag shows and trans events are also hosted there.

Yet, if meeting trans in San Francisco still seems challenging, then you can use popular trans dating sites to make it easier.


6. Strip Clubs

While there are many luxurious strip clubs in San Francisco, they usually tip toward the pricier side.

The entry fee can be anywhere from $7-40 and champagne go over $200. And unsurprisingly, lap dances can also suck your wallet dry.

With that being said, the following are some of the best strip clubs we recommend:

• Deja Vu Centerfolds – Located at Broadway, here you can enjoy full-nude shows offered by jaw-dropping dancers to have an unforgettable nightlife experience in San Francisco.

• New Century – Located at Larkin St, a perfect place to get you in the mood as this is both a full-nude strip club and an adult theatre.

• Divas Night Out – Located at Broadway, this is a strip club for girls and a perfect place to host hen’s parties.


Best Places For Outdoor Sex

If you’re bored to have sex in the bedroom or enjoy the thrill to get caught while doing it… Why not go for some fucking around the city?

These are our top hotspots in San Francisco for sex in public:

Foothills Park – There are several fire trails to go hiking and plenty of trees to hide behind to have a quickie.

Grizzly Peak – Another great hike with a beautiful sunrise. At sunset is a busy spot but at sunrise during weekdays is deserted. Bring a blanket and lay down for a romantic sexual experience.

North Beach – There are several beaches in San Francisco but North Beach is the safest to have sex.

Lake Merced – If you’re looking for a quiet place to have car sex, around Lake Merced you’ll find several secluded areas.

Lake Merced

Lake Merced in San Francisco

As with any outdoor sex activities, don’t forget to bring lubes, blankets, and a bag to dispose of any “sex litter” afterward. But most importantly, don’t get caught by the police because it’s illegal having sex in public places.


Adult Hotels And Hostels In San Francisco

If you’re looking for casual hookups, then your time in San Francisco can become even crazier if you stay at the right place.

We suggest booking a room near Union Square and suggest the following hotels in San Francisco near that area:

• Hotel Emblem

• The Donatello Hotel

• Hotel Abri

Alternatively, hostels can also be a great place to find casual hookups, as long as you stay in the right one.

Here are some party hostels in San Francisco you can crash at:

• HI San City Center

• Green Tortoise Hostel

• HI San Downtown Hostel


Safe Sex And San Francisco Clinics

San Francisco’s debaucherous nightlife can help us lose control, but don’t forget about your sexual health.

Always use protection to avoid STDs and unwanted pregnancies, and get frequent sexual health checkups at San Francisco City Clinic and Communicable Disease Clinic.

This ends the San Francisco sex guide. Enjoy hooking up here.




  • Louise And Dan

    We are born and bred Californians who love socializing, adventures, and sex. Being active in the ethical non-monogamy communities here locally and online, it's only natural for us to start this site to provide a 100% honest source of information about the sexual lifestyle in some of the world’s liberated adult destinations. We spend most of our free time traveling to hook up with singles, couples, and people of all genders around the world.