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How To Ask A Girl To Hook Up In Person: 9 Examples What To Tell And How To Behave

man asking a girl to hook up

“Would you hook up with me?”

Imagine a girl asking you this question. How would you feel?

Perhaps excited and ready for the action.

Yet, if you ask a girl to hook up in the same way, she would freeze and think you’re desperate… And girls don’t like desperate men.

Even though casual sex is common these days and girls are open-minded about it, you can’t be so straightforward every time.

Fortunately, there are ways to ask a girl to hook up without turning her off by being needy or douchey.

But before giving you some examples of what to tell her, it’s important to learn the right behavior to have in the first place.

 

How To Behave Before Asking A Girl To Hook Up

guy ask a girl for hookup

Most girls like to screen their potential sex partners by giving them a hard time. They are concerned about discretion and judgment.

So you should prove that you’re an open-minded guy who doesn’t judge her for having casual sex.

And most importantly, show her that you can keep your mouth shut about who you’re having sex with. In short, be sex-positive and confidential.

If you can do that, you become the sort of guy girls like to fuck. To be that kind of guy, here are some of the behaviors you should aim for:

  • Respect her – she needs to know that you value her as a person. She doesn’t have to feel like a sex object.
  • Don’t be judgemental – let her know that you recognize that she’s free to enjoy sex just like you. Avoid engaging in slut-shaming behaviors.
  • Be open-minded – don’t freak out about sexual tastes or interests that aren’t “normal.”
  • Be trustworthy – no one likes a blabbermouth. So let her know that whatever goes on between you two will stay a secret.
  • Be fun – hooking up should be fun, so be outgoing and adventurous.
  • Be generous – It’s well known that girls can’t resist a generous guy. If you give, they’ll feel compelled to give in return.
  • Be gentle but firm – If you’re too gentle you come off as a weak man. So be firm as well.

Once you’ve done that, build a social circle of sex-positive people. You can find Sex Geek groups on adult dating sites like Adult Friend Finder. Check out the meetup in your area, join it!

Now that you know the basics of how to behave around her, below you’ll find 9 examples to tell a girl you want to hook up.

 

How To Tell A Girl You Want To Hook Up

 

1. Are You Up For Some Netflix And Chill?

At this time, it’s already a given that Netflix and chill basically mean asking someone to hook up.

There’s no way a girl will see this question as anything but an offer for casual sex. On that note, it’s a good line whether you’re talking face to face or want to ask a girl to hook up over text.

Why this works: since it’s clear to both parties that the offer isn’t anything serious, there’s no pressure or confusion about your intention.

 

2. Want To Have Some Drinks With Me?

This classic never gets old since it’s an indirect yet obvious line people use when they want to hook up. In addition, going out for drinks often seals the deal.

When alcohol is involved, it often leads to sexy moments that end up in bed.

It’s supported by this Medical News article as it confirms that alcohol makes women hornier and more attracted to men.

Why this works: even if she’s not sure about hooking up, you can effectively convince her with alcohol.

 

3. I Take You Home

Girls love a gentleman, especially if he cares about their safety.

By using this line instead of “Can I Take You Home?” you’re showing her that you’re confident and in charge. Asking permission questions can backfire.

To have a positive outcome, you need to ensure that she’s at least comfortable enough with you before you ask her.

Why this works: girls love to be protected by a confident guy.

 

4. Hey “Jane”, Do You Know Someone Interested Into A Friends With Benefits Relationship?

If you fancy hooking up with one of your friends, you can ask her this indirect question.

If she wants the job, good for you. Or she might refer to some of her girlfriends that are up for it.

As explained in the friends with benefits guide, this casual relationship offers the opportunity to hook up with a girl over a long period of time without having to get serious.

Why this works: by being indirect you don’t pressure your friend to refuse you which could harm your friendship.

 

5. I’m Looking For Some Casual Fun, Are You Down With It?

When your target is an open-minded girl, being vague won’t impress her much. With that said, the best approach is to be straightforward without being rude.

Not only will she welcome your honesty, but she’ll think positively of you as well. And most of all, If she’s into you, she’ll take up your offer quickly.

Why this works: you’ll come off as a confident guy who knows what he wants.

 

6. Want To Come Over?

Asking her to come over to your house is another excellent way to hint that you want to hook up.

You can even tempt her by suggesting things that she may like, such as food or games, at the end of your question.

In this way, your invitation will be harder to resist as it won’t only imply having sex.

Why this works: a fun activity or a yummy meal on top of sex? What more could a girl want from a guy?

 

7. I’m Attracted to You, But I’m Not Ready to Commit Yet

While there’s nothing wrong with disliking relationships, letting a girl know won’t earn you any points.

In fact, completely shutting down the idea of dating seriously may turn off a lot of them.

For this reason, it’s better to say that you’re into them but not yet ready to commit. This way, you’ll appear hard to get, which is what women like. Psychology today’s article supports our point.

Why this works: presenting yourself as a challenge will make girls more interested in sleeping with you.

 

8. Want To Have Fun At My Place?

You should use this line to hint that you want to hook up with a girl when you’re outside.

But of course, you need to be sure that she’s indeed enjoying your company first. This way, your invitation to extend the fun has a basis and will have a stronger impact.

Besides, if she’s having fun, she’ll be eager to go with you.

Why this works: by keeping the mood light and focusing on the “fun” aspect, she can’t misinterpret it as something more.

 

9. Want To Move The Party To My Place Or Yours?

When you’re having a grand time at a party or nightclub, one of the best ways to ask a girl to hook up is to suggest moving the ‘party’ to a different location.

What’s nice about this is that you’re giving her power over the situation since you’re leaving it all up to her. As a result, she’ll feel in control, making her more confident to go for it.

Why this works: she’ll be happy to take charge of what happens with you and her.

 

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  • Tom Phillips

    Tom Phillips is a Dating Coach for World Hookup Guides who has been helping men to succeed with women for almost 7 years. His coaching career began with one-on-one coaching and has gradually evolved into seminars. He has dated successfully dated several women over the years and now shares strategies and techniques on several national publications in addition to World Hookup Guides.

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